Page 3 of 3 FirstFirst 123
Results 51 to 66 of 66

Thread: Dad Joke Thread

  1. #51
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    6,093

    Default

    Hoping you have a sense of humor too!

  2. #52
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    On an island that is long
    Posts
    12,227

    Default

    Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?
    "And Morrison? He did what All-Americans do. He shot daggers in the daylight and stole a win." - Steve Kelley (Seattle Times)

    "Gonzaga is a special place, with special people!" - Dan Dickau #21

    Foo me once shame on you, Foo me twice shame on me.

    2012 Foostrodamus - Foothsayer of Death

  3. #53
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    On an island that is long
    Posts
    12,227

    Default

    Food is great but there is no atmosphere.
    "And Morrison? He did what All-Americans do. He shot daggers in the daylight and stole a win." - Steve Kelley (Seattle Times)

    "Gonzaga is a special place, with special people!" - Dan Dickau #21

    Foo me once shame on you, Foo me twice shame on me.

    2012 Foostrodamus - Foothsayer of Death

  4. #54
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Greater Tacoma
    Posts
    5,343

    Default

    Dad Joke: Why do you always see ghouls and demons together?
    .
    .
    .
    "thnk god for few" jazzdelmar(12/12/11 12:50pm)
    .
    "When most of us couldn't buy a basket. Where do we get off anyway?!" siliconzag (11/17/06 5:45:41 pm)
    .
    I am monitoring the price of a donut
    .

  5. #55
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Greater Tacoma
    Posts
    5,343

    Default

    Because demons are a ghoul's best friend.
    .
    .
    .
    "thnk god for few" jazzdelmar(12/12/11 12:50pm)
    .
    "When most of us couldn't buy a basket. Where do we get off anyway?!" siliconzag (11/17/06 5:45:41 pm)
    .
    I am monitoring the price of a donut
    .

  6. #56
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  7. #57
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    You rocket.
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  8. #58
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    1,317

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Centre Mad Man View Post
    How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
    Would that be an "astroTOT"?

  9. #59
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    6,093

    Default

    A man and his wife are awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

    “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed.

    “Who was that?” asked his wife.

    “Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers.

    “Did you help him?” she asks.

    “No, I did not, it’s 3 am in the morning and it’s pouring out there!”

    “Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him.”

    The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”

    “Yes,” comes back the answer.

    “Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.

    “Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.

    “Where are you?” asks the husband.

    “Over here on the swing,” replies the drunk
    Hoping you have a sense of humor too!

  10. #60
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    “Orion’s Belt is a huge waste of space.”

    ...bad joke...three stars...
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  11. #61
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    Why was six afraid of seven?


    Because 7-8-9.
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  12. #62
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    That joke has been around for a long time and seven has been stigmatized, because nobody asked him why.
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  13. #63
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    Why did seven eat nine?

    Because he was told to eat 3 squared meals per day
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  14. #64
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    6,093

    Default

    Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.
    The pharmacist at the counter asked the older boy, 'Son, how old are you?'
    'Eight', the boy replied.
    The man continued, 'Do you know what these are used for?'
    The boy replied, 'Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four."
    "Oh, really?" the pharmacist replied with a grin.
    "Yes." the boy said. "We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim, play tennis and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do none of those."
    Hoping you have a sense of humor too!

  15. #65
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    The Pub
    Posts
    6,703

    Default

    Did you hear?

    That Oxygen...and Magnesium...

    Are dating?




    OMG!
    “There is no premium content on the GUBoards. We get what we pay for.”
    Pope John XXIII in his remarks to the College of Cardinals
    -12-21-2012
    -

  16. #66
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    On an island that is long
    Posts
    12,227

    Default

    My wife told me to stop pretending to be butter... but I am on a roll now.
    "And Morrison? He did what All-Americans do. He shot daggers in the daylight and stole a win." - Steve Kelley (Seattle Times)

    "Gonzaga is a special place, with special people!" - Dan Dickau #21

    Foo me once shame on you, Foo me twice shame on me.

    2012 Foostrodamus - Foothsayer of Death

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •